I thought I would feel better, but really I don't
I thought I would feel more, but really I grew numb
I thought I would feel relief, but really I feel more stressed
I thought I would feel happy to leave it behind, but really I wanted much more time.
Not more time in the place, but with some of the people.
I feel like I've lost them all.
No I didn't , I can still talk to them
But they're not here.
That was what made all the difference.
Sometimes talking isn't enough.
Company, even in silence, was great.
Company without silence was better.
And now I sit here rambling... still numb, by the way.
It'll probably hit me when I lay down as it always does
Sleep takes away all the filters
But it leaves me with the voices and the memories.
Those never go away.
I'll have those forever.
It's okay, I guess.
At least one constant in my life.